Here and now . . . really?

This anecdote is inspired from the fact that I will be at the airport tomorrow, and it will be brief because I have packing to do. Now, although I do not sit on the airport floor with my boarding group in order to nab a "great seat," I do board at my earliest opportunity. I like to get settled, arrange my in-flight reading material in the pocket in front of me, and find a space in the overhead for my wadded-up jacket. If I've purchased a snack at the gate, I like to get it staged and ready to savor. I also like to sit in judgment of those who place their rollies sideways in the overhead bin and the men who try to claim an entire bin for their suit jackets. I enjoy watching the flight attendants expertly rearranging items and clacking the bins shut.

Inspired by yesterday's code brown post, I would like to share a little story. About six or seven years ago, I was taking a flight from Cincinnati to Chicago to see the hubby (before he was the hubby). I boarded early--probably 25 minutes before the door was going to close--for all the reasons listed above. In fact, only one person boarded ahead of me. Here is what he did: He raced directly to the lavatory in the back of the plane. From my typically crappy-status-middle-toward-the-back seat, I could hear and, soon after, smell the intestinal distress transpiring in that lavatory. Five minutes later, he exited without a trace of embarrassment and took his seat. As the plane filled, every other passenger could smell it and boy did it linger. I was trying to make cringy-faced expressions and eye contact to indicate, "Wasn't me." NTB. Earlier, when the action was still audible, a flight attendant and I had exchanged a single, horrified glance. Six or seven years later, I remember this incident. What I'm still trying to work out is why, with plenty of time to spare, this man chose to do his business in the airplane lavatory and not in the gate area where he could have chosen a larger stall with better ventilation and a potentially smaller and more transient audience. Yes, I know sometimes these things can catch you off guard, but the way he hustled to the back of the plane, it was as if he had been waiting to use that lavatory.