I recently read Life Is Friends: The Complete Guide to the Lost Art of Communicating in Person by Jeanne Martinet. It was a thought-provoking read for me, and I have a couple of blog posts in mind inspired by the book. Although the book is about rediscovering the "lost art of connecting in person," Martinet does briefly address email etiquette. She writes, "It is unfathomable to me that there are people who will fail to respond to an e-mail from someone they know" (59). That line has stuck with me for a couple of weeks now.
I fear I am one of those people who will fail to respond to an e-mail from someone they know, and I feel like crap about it. I LOVE receiving personal emails and always read them thinking about what I want to write in return. I want to be positive, encouraging, funny, sensitive, supportive . . . whatever I think the person who emailed me wants or needs me to be (but in a genuine, non-chameleon type way). At the very least, I want to say, "No, I cannot meet at the park Tuesday" or "Thanks for asking, but we can't sign up for a music class next session." I like to give personal emails my full attention, but throughout most of the day, those darn kids of mine need attention as well. Then, during naptime, I need to clean stuff up to achieve a baseline semblance of order and calm or I need to snack or rest my eyes or escape for a few minutes into a novel or television show. I do some emailing during naptime if I can, but sometimes, even when the boys are asleep, I don't have the energy to write the kinds of emails I want to write. I wait to respond until I can "write a good one" and then eventually write back days or weeks later, but sometimes forget altogether. I hate that about myself.
I guess I'm hesitant to respond to a newsy or important email from a friend with a brief "thanks" or "sounds good" or "great news!" or, God forbid, "LOL." However, I think it must be better to write something right away to acknowledge receipt of the email, even if it is not the most awesome email ever written. I'm going to work on it and try to strike a balance between "thx" and a carefully-crafted 750-word letter.
Any email best practices or pet peeves? Any tips for me? I don't even have an address book established in any of my three(?) email accounts so if you use any sort of folder or sorting system to help you be a great emailing friend, clue me in.
I do have a preferred email closing, which I will lay on you right now ...
Peace out,
MEP
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8 comments:
I do the same thing. I am getting better about sending a short email, though, and then a longer one later, if necessary. I have one friend that only responds to my emails 1 in 5 times, maybe. It is really frustrating.
Peace out is perfect.
One of my good friends started "prioritizing" my emails for me by levels - level 1=need a response now, level 2= sometime soon and level 3= read and delete. She would put the level in the subject line. So, I feel your pain and obviously am not on top of my emails either. Imagine if I had to call all those people back to reply...it would take me years! I am much quicker at emails! L
I was never one for a simple "thanks" until I realized that I liked getting that so that I know my email was received. (I'm not a fan of the email set up where you automatically send return receipt...clutters inbox).
I have a general pet peeve, not limited to email, in which if you are asked to RSVP, DO SO!!! I was never big on calling to say "sorry can't make it, blah blah blah" because you end up feeling the need to apologize or overexplain. However, email is so simple..."would love to come but can't make it" or "sounds great, see you then!" Such responses are not difficult, and they make life much happier for the hostess:) I wish I had a trademark closing though...
The other problem, at least for me, is actually LOSING the email, so even if I plan to return the message, it gets stuck amidst all the other junk, and you forget about it, or truly can't find it. Now that yahoo mail has unlimited storage, I am VERY bad about deleting mail, even the unimportant stuff. I even have a junk mail address, but it seems more and more stuff is creeping into my "real" inbox. I also find myself apologizing for not sending a longer message, but really hate setting that tone as well. I agree about being glad I don't have to conduct a lot of business on the phone, though. I am WAY worse about returning phone calls, or even making ones that I have to.
(I just have to say that I love getting emails from you, and think you are pretty good at responding)
I agree with carabee. I have plenty of time, ntb. There are, however, times when you want to say more but don't have the inclination. A simple immediate response is good followed by a will discuss later or whatever you tag line for longer emails later will be. m
i, too, am bad about responding to anything these days. and there are too many things to respond to: messages on my cell, messages on my machine at home, e-mail, facebook inbox. seriously? now of all of those, i might be the best at e-mail, simply because i can fake enthusiasm (maybe not fake, but when i've got nothing left to give at the end of the day, writing with care is easier for me than gearing up for a phonecall). i'm just hoping that the people who matter most understand me well enough not to be annoyed with me!
and lap, i'm with you on the rsvp thing. and i always appreciate when people give the option to respond by e-mail. much easier.
Hm. I think probably the first step is to make sure your email account is functioning properly?
I miss you... You make me laugh! BDAVIN
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